Suzie Parkus is an expert in creating compelling communication and teaching others to do the same, as well as being savvy when it comes to business growth and building relationships.
She is a sought after speaker, trainer and media contributor.
This episode explores good PR, communication, connecting people and some secrets to better networking as well as some great examples of fantastic customer service from around the world.
- suzieparkus.com (Company Website)
- twitter.com/SuzieParkus (Twitter)
- facebook.com/meetyourmatch.club (Facebook Fan Page)
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Episode 37 – Suzie Parkus – 04-06-2019.mp3
Tony Winyard [00:00:00] Exceeding expectations. Episode 37 welcome to the podcast where we give you ideas on how you can give your customers better experiences so they will stay with you longer and you’ll get better testimonials and more referrals as well. This week’s episode is with Suzie Parkus at the end of last week I told you it’s going to be a Adrian Shepherd and that was the plan but plans don’t always come to fruition that I especially when there’s technical hitches and there was a little technical issue with the episode featured Adrian. But we will get that rectified and I think we may have that episode next week. So this week is Suzie Parkus Suzy lives in north London and she is a an expert in many different fields but certainly in connecting people whether that be in business or also in romance. And she’s an expert in PR as well. So we’re going to have a lot more about all the different things that Susie does. If you do enjoy this podcast why not leave a review for us on iTunes or Stitcher and let us know anything about the show that you like dislike guess you’d like to hear. You can join the facebook group the exceeding expectations group on Facebook. Pop some questions in there and we’ll get back to you.
Tony Winyard [00:01:24] So enjoy this week’s episode with Suzie Parkus exceeded my expectations.
Tony Winyard [00:01:36] I’m my guest this week is Suzie Parkus. Say dance season. I’m ready. Thank you. You. Very well we’re citizens lovely hotel in Laura Ashley hotel. Oh and I’ve got a real dilemma this week in this week’s episode because I don’t know where to start. I’ve been chatting with Suzie for the last hour or so and there are so many stories and I it’s going to be difficult consigning this to 45 minutes something is the issue we’re going to try. So where do we start. So Susie turn it off for the listeners who aren’t familiar with you.
Tony Winyard [00:02:09] Can you try to encapsulate it a couple of paragraphs maybe what you know what it is you do and something about you show it offering because overseen by.
Suzie Parkus [00:02:19] My background spans you know quite a number of years and years in which I have had five businesses and long story short I say that I am a catalyst for helping people to be the best version of themselves whether that’s how I am business and mindset it’s really looking at the past and and communications skills is one of my big things and then obviously as you know I’ve got my book coming out which is stay with work life balance and making sure that you are showing up as the best version of you. So that’s that’s really who I am and the place in which I come from. If you look at sort of Simon Sinek and his why why why is to really help people.
Tony Winyard [00:02:56] And you you sort of touched upon you’ve on so many things previously you know you did the whole dating relationship stuff and and many other things as well. So we’ve listless thought with the current book you’re working on now. Tell us a little bit about that. What gave you the inspiration to write that in the first place.
Suzie Parkus [00:03:15] So I was involved in that site and four years ago and it really has changed my life and in so many ways in terms of I wasn’t able to work for a while and I had a lot of medical stuff going on and just this that and the other and you know you fast forward to now and in hindsight and with a different perception and with introspection I feel like it was a life intervention it was actually a lifeline in disguise because I was this egotistical highly driven entrepreneur who was living life in a super fast lane and I clearly couldn’t carry on in that way. And I see that he asked and came along to change a lot of things to me in terms of how I was showing up in life the business that I was having and how I was operating as a human being and as a result of working on myself and working through a lot of things and challenges that came up in the last four years. I I feel I’ve become the best version of myself in my book talks about the effects of trauma and physical emotional and spiritual dis ease the effects of stress and what it can do to you. Looking at the signs before the big one comes and hits you in the face like minded and and just really about living your best life and start today and don’t wait for a massive something when all that’s happened in your life you need to you know to think you know something needs to change.
Tony Winyard [00:04:42] And so if everything goes to plan when you think the book may be out.
Suzie Parkus [00:04:47] Well it depends if we get the publishing rights or not but somewhere between now and the next nine months I’d say it really feels like giving birth to a baby right now.
Tony Winyard [00:04:57] And as far as exceeding expectations is concerned there is so many stories you were telling me before we could we could delve into this part of the story you send me back I guess I guess yes the ladies clothing line.
Suzie Parkus [00:05:13] Well I used to live in Canada for a short while and kind of does actually very well known for their customer services but I’ve never seen anything like this before I walked into the shop and as soon as I arrived I picked up a couple of things and maybe we had about four or five items before the shop assistant came over and said Hey ma’am can I set up a changing room for you. I was just like what is this. And I just kept picking up more or more items and she just kept putting them in the changing room whereas here in the UK you’re lucky if you can get up to five or six items max and then I’ll put the other thing things on the side and then you can go back annoyingly and grab them later. And it was just an amazing experience and even if I had the wrong size she went and changed it for me and nothing was too much and it just felt like I was having a personal shopping experience or some kind of celebrity. And actually this is just the way that they operate.
Tony Winyard [00:06:05] And would you say that was just guess or Canada as it would you think it was.
Suzie Parkus [00:06:10] I definitely wasn’t like that in every shop. You know every ladies clothing shop. That one was definitely exceptional. But obviously they’re a mid to high range out there as well so you go to Old Navy it’s almost like all Primark. You’re not going to get that kind of experience. But then there were certain restaurants where the customer service and the the staff and themselves that it was just you know another experience again. Customer service is really high up on the agenda there. So I know we spoke about Pickle Barrel for example and it is really well known throughout Canada and some people outside of the Customs Service that is incredible. The waiting staff are amazing.
[00:06:52] So do you think that generally or there’s something about Canada that have a different approach to customer service and we typically do in the UK. Yeah.
[00:07:01] They’re they’re friendlier there. They’re far more chatty here if you smile at somebody I think they think that something’s wrong with you. Whereas even when I was living there I was just sitting in Starbucks by myself and people approach me and come talk to me. They’re more open and inquisitive and just generally helpful than people are by nature here I’d say. And everything just seems so easy asking for directions or doors being held open. People really being grateful for your your custom. That’s the other thing you can take it for granted they were so grateful. There’s also a different approach there in terms of the service fees that you pay is a pickle barrel. We pay 20 percent mandatory and people rarely work for the service and they deserve it as well. Some of them just really go beyond the call of duty to make sure you have a good experience.
[00:07:52] Tell us more about pick about that.
[00:07:55] That sounded fascinating when we were talking about so pickle barrel is not like eating at the Ivy. For example I’m trying to think it’s probably like the equivalent of our wagon mama I say so it’s a chain and it’s burgers and salads and but it’s it’s nice stuff. It’s not McDonald’s.
[00:08:13] And I’d say that the waiting staff are constantly on you in terms of their eyes are constantly grazing around the world the room to see if somebody needs a refill or they finished eating maybe it’s time to have dessert. You just weren’t waiting around for anything but similarly one of the annoying things when you eat out is people take the plates away as soon as you finish. The other people haven’t. And just none of that was going on. Everything was just so seamless and your needs were there needs basically and you felt it and you were welcomed as soon as you came in it was you know we’re grateful to have you you’re coming to kind of spend money in our establishments even though they’re just the waiting staff and as you left it was by. Thanks man. Come again and it just felt very friendly rather than here where it’s at a dinner it’s very transactional and there was something you told me about the tips 20 percent.
[00:09:12] Yeah. So it’s a 20 percent mandatory tip and the waiting staff you know they deserve it and so much more.
[00:09:20] And so there was was did you say there was a queue or something.
[00:09:23] Yes. Like when when somebody was leaving that branch there is a waiting list to become a server at pickle barrel because you can make a lot of money on the tips.
[00:09:35] Well you know I can’t think of. I certainly haven’t heard of any shops here where there’s a queue for people to join is a you know in a restaurant with some type of a like a bag of Mama’s or whatever.
[00:09:46] No. You know people I think would just be happy to get a job wherever but I think I had something random about people auctioning off their their jobs on eBay. All right.
[00:09:54] It was just the most bizarre thing I’ve ever heard from all the different places you’ve been to. How different is customer service in different areas and how much of it. What factor plays into it. You know the local people. And how does that change things in different places.
[00:10:09] That’s sure Daphne travelled and that’s for sure. And so you mentioned that I was way in the Dominican and if you bought stuff from the local street sellers they were so helpful you know they knew that I wanted certain quality food and they helped me pick out the nice bits from the rotten stuff. And that was a very different experience to the supermarket. The supermarkets were awful and it was like a meat market. It’s just he was worse than all supermarkets here. But you go and support the local businesses and the gratitude was just second to none and it felt very friendly and lovely. I’m trying to think when I was in Valencia and I was staying at the media hotel. The staff there were incredible. We we actually chose the wrong location. Actually we meant to be downtown winds up being at the conference centre and the manageress. She basically said this is how to get certain attractions and this is what I recommend. She recommended restaurants and they bent over backwards for us to have a really good experience and Canada. I honestly can’t speak highly enough the customer service there is just phenomenal and the gratitude for the custom is something that I’ve never forgotten.
[00:11:22] And so with your clearly you think you identify or you’re quite observant when it comes to customer service it sounds like from what you’ve been saying and so in your job in a coach in you do. Have you tried to. What. What would you say you do differently maybe as a coach in the way you treat your customers.
[00:11:41] Well I can tell you that I buy my clients care not because I’m driving them but one lady in particular as an example. She’d she’d done say well we were actually working through her business staff and we ended up incorporating some personal development things in because she had some limiting beliefs and some mindset staff and for her to really get to the next level with her business. We had to deal with that staff and I customer ordered her a mug and a book for her journal and it was just stuff for her as a reminder but to keep going with the journey and actually I ended up getting a present from her as well. It was never planned and that was really beautiful to get stuff as a gift.
[00:12:21] And I’m trying to think I mean I just have my own style. So there are some coaches who will just give you that hour or whatever the designated time is and I give you my time but then I give you more time because in the background I’m writing up your notes I’m sending you things I wanted my clients at the moment she wants I’m speaking gigs and as I’m out doing my business I identify opportunities for her and I sometimes promote her or I just send her links for things to consider. So I’m constantly making sure that my client is evolving and if there’s something I can bring to the table outside of these sessions my job is to help Excel my clients that’s what they’re paying for.
[00:13:00] I’ve noticed also in social media one of the things that you do is you often there’ll be some sort of opportunity you’ve identified and you say Oh there’s there’s this there’s anyone or you talk about how you’ve connected a couple of different people you seem to be doing things like that on a frequent basis.
[00:13:16] I love connecting people. I think it’s the natural matchmaker in me. Bobby why did I say well at the matchmaking. So I do recruit for the media so the journalists come to me because I haven’t been in the media myself and done a good job for them. They run their own stories and sometimes can’t find the person for the story they want to run so they know I have a big big network and. And so I sometimes I was ever in a position where I’m basically recruiting for them. But similarly I’m just thinking about something the other day where somebody posted they were in a situation and you could tell from their post they were crying out for a certain type of person. So I tagged somebody into it and I said you two should speak. And it’s just about being a person of value and this is what I teach in the communication work that I do I teach on occasion. Being a person of value also means you become a person of influence as well. And it’s about thinking about other people and adding value and supporting others and not just thinking about me me me the whole time.
[00:14:14] Such upon the matchmaking you just spoke about what women what was it you were doing in that whole matchmaking and relationship and so on so it started with singles events and people asked me for dating coaching so emergence dating coaching. I’d coach myself from heartbroken to heart open anyway. And it was actually a service I was offering was something that people wanted and then people said to me do you match make. And again it wasn’t something I was looking to offer but I’ve always connected people in business and romance anyway because I just see opportunities of people as you mentioned and these people that I was serving were professionals who are cash rich time poor and I said I don’t have time to go on all these dates to find somebody but could you do the gatekeeping for me and so the matchmaking service was born.
[00:15:03] And so I imagine from. From what I know of the dates and seeing that you know a lot of people are just using your app such as Tinder and so on. So a service like that is just so is so much more than you get from one of these apps.
[00:15:18] There’s matchmaking there’s matchmaking so you have some matchmakers you have a list and they’ll only match make you against that list and it’s you know tough luck if the person you want isn’t on there. How I operated was as a head-hunter. So you’re all my clients and we together agree on what would be good for you and what works for you and it can’t be this whole big shopping list either. And then as you’ve seen me do on social media I go to my network and my networks network and I say I’m looking specifically for heat you know. And that’s how I did it and I grew my network from zero to over 30000 in 18 months. Wow. So I manage to find 30000 singles in 18 months.
[00:15:58] Q So there’s a lot of happy couples married because of it.
[00:16:01] Yes and babies and marriages and and also it’s I’ve definitely at my place in heaven.
[00:16:05] Fantastic. So let’s go we’re going back to some of the stories we’re show for one of the ones I really liked was your mechanic.
[00:16:14] Elizabeth Eddie So Eddie’s been my mechanic probably since I was in my teens is a long time ago and he’s just a very kind a Greek guy who is set up on his own and he’s pretty much self-taught and he’s just got the roughest garage you’ve ever seen. Not larded are like a main street garage but it’s him it’s his nature. You know it started off with him you know come into my house and servicing my car at my house and doing whatever. Setting up his premises and he still comes and collects the car and takes it back. That’s when I was living locally. Now he’s over an hour away which is quite an important point to mention because I still see him even though he’s an hour away because of the trust that’s being built up over the years when he works on my car. Whether it’s an M80 or a service or perhaps I’ve just got to a nickel that I’m worried about. I feel that he always it’s the best option and he’s completely honest if he can just I’d know titans and nuts and bolts then that’s it. And he may or may not even charge me because it’s taken five minutes and he won’t charge me to diagnose what’s going on either. But then if something needs doing he’ll be completely honest and say look you need a car part that’s of the manufacturing that I’ve the car that I’ve got the time or we can go to the market place at Euro car parts and get something from there and he just gives me all my options and I feel that he considers my back pocket always whereas a main street dealer it’s very expensive it’s always their parts and I’ve even had experiences where they don’t know what they’re doing. And he’s a problem solver.
[00:17:52] So he’s a real example for and I’m guessing you’ve also referred him to that many loads. Yeah. So because of there he goes the extra mile to give an amazing service. So therefore he’s got so much more business from people like he’s too busy.
[00:18:07] In fact if you know you try and see him for something that wasn’t easy but then like a service for him may say you’ll be really lucky to see him within two weeks.
[00:18:15] Are you a hairdresser that you’ve been using since you started. I know amazed me since you were 7 years old. Yeah on and off since I was 7 and the same you know she started being across the other side of the park to me so maybe like a 10 minute walk and now she’s over an hour away as well because obviously we will we will move and move on and.
[00:18:37] Put it this way she wins away one summer and she said to me it’s fine go and see another hairdresser and I did and it was a disaster and I would never do that again. So I make sure that whenever I see her which is infrequently but frequently enough I work around her holidays.
[00:18:52] I travel the hour and go see her and it’s just such a welcoming experience if she does it from home now anyway. But the kettle is on and so when I arrived straightaway the TS made and just everything is lined up for me and she does for every single client it’s it’s all about you and you just you just feel like you’re important and she builds a relationship with you obviously I gave nine offers like quite a number of years now but she is building a relationship with you and it’s not just sit in my chair and let me get my scissors out and she does that for everyone as she works.
[00:19:28] Yeah I’ve been there when she’s got other clients and it’s just like one extended family and I trust her. I mean there are times where I’m literally just not even paying attention and paying on my phone and she does her thing and then she’s like we’re done now and my Oh great. You know because she knows me she’s taken the time to get to know what works for me and what what I like and how I like to be treated as well.
[00:19:49] A new story of House of Fraser with your mum. That was a very nice thought.
[00:19:53] Yes. So I bought something from House Fraser and I bought it with vouchers and cash and obviously we can do a refund within 30 days but I’ve done some weird thing across two receipts. And anyway I need to take some stuff back. I kept one and it did take some stuff back and I actually couldn’t get up within the timeframe before the policy run out for Easter refund. So I asked my mom if she’d go and do it. And I called up ahead of time to make sure that was okay. And then they told me it was gonna be a problem with the refund because I used different methods to pay for it. So then I went and found the woman who was head of the department and explained the situation. I said look you know your your colleague has said I can’t do a refund but this is the situation and she said basically send your mom up. Bring the receipts bring the goods and it’s fine. I’ll sort it out as long as she asks for me. So my mom asks for her the refund gets down no problem at all because she’s obviously head of the department and then takes my mom off to the coffee shop and make sure that she’s nice and comes with a coffee for her troubles for coming in and doing the refund. So it just shows the level of customer service at some places but it’s the care you know we talked about the pickle barrel before and for me the thread so far it’s all about caring about the custom in care and making sure that your customers come back because you’re only as good as your last experience with somebody nutritionists they say this is a different episode and then really because you just give me so many stories so tell me about it. They do nutritionist my nutritionist so my nutritionist was recommended to me recommendations are always far better than you know picking up somebody called and I trust her. She’s just an expert in her field and sometimes I’ve said to her.
[00:21:42] You know I’ve I’ve got a problem with something or you know can you think outside the box. And she’s made recommendations to other professionals but also and it’s a known fact. I believe that in the field that we’re in we get discounts when we’re recommending things so in her case it supplements. So she gets a consultants discount which she then passes on to me because she’s not interested in making extra money I mean she charges enough as it is but she’s worth it. But she’s not interested in making money on top just like Eddie my mechanic. It’s such an honest service and I get to have a saving as well.
[00:22:18] Do you do a lot of networking. Yes. What would you say as far as mindset and attitude is concerned with networking. What have you. Has your experience been and how should maybe people go about networking in a better way.
[00:22:35] Golf is an episode in itself. So I’ll give you some top tips Don’t go throwing around your business cards and don’t go collecting everyone’s business cards if you’ve got no intention of calling them because I think when somebody gives you a card they think they’re going to hear from you and vice versa. A tip that somebody gave me a long time ago is don’t deface somebodies business card. So if you go right on and you’re writing some notes it is great because it means you’re making a mental note. We should ask first. So do you mind if I just make a note of whatever it was we discussed on your card and it’s fine because if it’s my property that I’ve paid for and you’re now defacing it. I never thought about that until someone brought it my awareness. The other thing is don’t present with a sale because people go to network with a view to getting business which is fine. That’s kind of why you’re there you’re not going to find a lover or whatever but it’s about being a vanity first is about understanding somebody and building rapport and again it comes back to the communication skills I teach. But it’s about understanding somebody because we might not be a good fit and you shouldn’t work with somebody if your values are not aligned. I found that to be something quite powerful in terms of me enlisting the services of others but also taking on clients if our values are misaligned. It’s the most horrendous relationship.
[00:23:52] And as far as communication is concerned where do you think people go wrong with networking with their communication.
[00:23:58] They’re all mouth and no is and you can also offend people by being in their personal space. It’s actually quite a big thing. But we do have this whole personal space thing if you think that’s dirty dancing In and out and if you remember of anybody that’s listening remembers the scene where it was like This is my space and this is yours is Patrick Swayze and baby are doing their thing. And you know even when I was a personal trainer it’s you still have to be mindful of like touching people and getting too close and and being in such proximity that you could feel the heat of someone’s breath or you can feel them spitting on you. It’s not nice and it’s just being mindful and aware of how you’re presenting yourself and showing up.
[00:24:39] Also when sometimes it seems that the attitude some people have when I go to some sort of networking events is purely about what can I get from this moment and what I can do for other people.
[00:24:49] Yeah. As I said it’s about being a value it’s about you know it’s quite anti departs. For example it’s it’s what do you need. How how can I help you always even. I mean I’m lucky. He’s a friend of mine. But when he picks up the phone it’s so easy. How can I help you. It’s actually. Yes it’s. How are you. But it’s how can I help you today. And he leads with that and it’s something that’s been ingrained in me now.
[00:25:12] But why is it if you cannot read identify to listeners why that can make such a difference to someone’s business by having that kind of approach.
[00:25:22] Because it shows that you matter then comes back to this whole customer service thing we’re talking about before you matter. And it’s it’s you before me and there’s too many many more people out there. So it’s you know for example you and I meet in a room and and you know who are you and what do you do. And straightaway leading with interest so tell me more about what you do and why did you do it and who would you like to serve. Oh that’s interesting. You know what I know some people like that and leading the conversation that way and I’ll go Oh that’s cool. Can I help you with my service.
[00:25:56] Maybe I can help you get more business more so for people who are who maybe listen into this and think they probably need to do a bit more networking. What are the biggest mistakes people make when it comes to networking.
[00:26:11] The biggest mistakes people make are not being fully present. That’s that’s a really big one and not acknowledging the person in front of you. And. And talking more than they’re listening and making the agenda all about themselves and networking is not about going out to sell and to go and get as many business cards as possible and then cold call and oh the biggest one do not people put people on your meeting list without permission. That’s horrendous. Getting cold spam e-mail and it’s just about respecting people and treating people as people first. And if someone wants to buy into a they will and and having the patience set might not come today and it might not come tomorrow but be a value build a relationship and the business may or may not come.
[00:27:00] And so when you’ve been at work enterprise heavy over have you you kind of touch upon something there that you may not get business from someone immediately. It could be a year or so later. If you had experiences like that.
[00:27:11] Yeah. I mean I think that’s a lady from the states that I work with. We were introduced by somebody and it just got to know each other in fact I helped her close by getting her guests on her show. I was a guest on her show. I put people in her group and then she put something on Facebook once saying I needed something or another. And whilst I’m not that’s something or another I just had an inkling to speak to her because to me people were jumping on it and I felt quite protective. So we got on a call and I said I think you need X Y and Z because oh my gosh that makes sense can you help me. Mm hmm. But she didn’t come to me directly it was because actually I just said with value I led with Can I help you because I think you’re a bit lost and I think you’re looking for the wrong thing. And it also goes the other way. So I shared a stage with somebody two years ago and she had an impact and she really moved me with what she shared. And she does something that I knew I’d need at some point but it wasn’t an immediate need but that impact that she left behind has now led to her working with me two years later and she was surprised I called her but I said to her.
[00:28:20] But you made an impression before you you touched upon your show that you’re the podcast that you used to have and that quite intrigued me when you didn’t go into much detail but you had what 50 something episodes and it was about dating and relationship. Tell us about that. The podcast in terms of what it was covering how it came about what you got out of it what you feel your listeners got out of it.
[00:28:44] Again another podcast and it’s another podcast episode in itself. So I was on the radio for a year and a half I was the expert the resident dating expert and the show came to a close and somebody told me how many years before about podcasting as another medium you know alongside social media.
[00:29:04] And I just couldn’t fathom doing something else. I was already stretched as it was when the show came to a close and we done so when we had so many people calling in and giving great feedback. I wanted to carry on except this time I could carry on on my own terms and rather than being the experts I could offer my expertise but be the interviewer. So I decided to create a hot list of the people that I wanted to interview and I went for the big boys and I went for some really big names and I utilized my network and I utilized my head hunting skills as well. And I went out there and I I got all my guests and I covered things like masculine and feminine and how that shows up and plays out in relationships. It also covered things like how to communicate effectively say things like Margo technique for example in dating people come to the table with a chip on their shoulder. And so I had somebody who’d had a huge life experience to talk about how they work through e often and how it doesn’t define them and things about the law of attraction and mindset and limiting beliefs and we just went so far and so wide because all these things are so important in terms of developing you as a person and being the best version of yourself in a relationship and being able to try to attract and being able to attract the person that really aligns with you not the person that you think will work for you. There’s a huge difference though so we went into so many different layers and levels around dating science person and I want you stop that insular. I said I didn’t even start. That’s the sad things I have all the episodes that never went live because because of this accident that happened so it turned my world upside down and I still feel like one day I’d like to say just publish them and maybe as a collection and people can buy them because the people that I got to interview people cut off their right arm to speak save and I managed to get a 30 minute sometimes up to two hours of these people’s time and some of them came back for second third interview as well. And the content was just pure gold. And I loved every minute of it.
[00:31:13] I’m fascinated by people and from what we were talking about before you’re going to use some of that in a future book that you’ve you’ve got plans for.
[00:31:23] So there’s a book that I started way back when in 2014 about dating Faye pause and it looks at how people sort of show up on a date and maybe not the best version of themselves and how they can do better so slightly about mindset but more about taking scenarios and kind of explaining why that’s that’s not a good way to operate.
[00:31:47] When we started talking about books before and publishing and sort of books that your you’ve got plan you’ve got the one you’re working on now and you’ve already thought about the next one then I probably probably already brought back the next one after that. How do you think the books are going to help this or people that follow you and you know you’ve got a lot of people who kind of almost follow you every move it seems.
[00:32:10] Yeah I mean I have my cheerleaders. And you know as I wrote on Facebook the other day that’s the kind of support you can’t buy by the way. So if everyone who is ploughing loads of money into Facebook you can’t buy that kind of support. But going back to the books. So yes I have several planned I’m working on two simultaneously at the moment and they cover different content. So I think for me personally it shows those are following me right now and those that find me that I understand a lot of different things and I’m not trying to put it in one book and it covers you know dating and relationships and the trauma and the disease staff and communications and for me I feel it’s all interconnected. So wherever somebody meets me and my journey. So it could be book two but 10 please I get to 10. They will find their way in and then it will help them to sidestep and leapfrog across to maybe a different version or into a product or into a service or coming to a talk or work with me one to one. But it’s it’s a touchpoint that then brings them that bit closer to me and understanding what it is I know and how I might be able to help them in some capacity through some product or service.
[00:33:28] And because you also mentioned before it is mainly because there’s so many things that you’ve done and so you’ve I think you said you’ve got some courses as well.
[00:33:35] Of course is is that you’ve got an offer at the moment so I’ve got the four step sedating success so that’s effectively my one to one dating coaching in a course that you can take yourself through. And just so what would people get from something like that you would understand how you’re showing up as a person you would understand why your past relationships haven’t worked and what it is that you need to do and become in order to attract that which you want. And there are exercises to really hone in on who and what would work for you specifically and it moves away from an episode of weird science where you tap in a blonde blue eyes Fifer whatever but really looking at the stuff that matters. So the values of somebody they’re drivers looking at your own also. That there is just so much but really we need to understand where we’re at right now how we’re showing up how other people perceive us then looking at what it is that we’re looking to attract and then seeing the mismatch between the two. And of course takes you through all of that as well as where to look to find your perfect person. Although there’s no such thing as perfect it’s subjective. So that’s the course everywhere. So we have the DIY publicity course because I’ve done all my own publicity so I’ve been featured in the national local and international price. And people want to do the same. There is a course that walks you through everything that I did it’s my blueprint as to how I built the rapport and I got people asking me to be featured and be re featured so how you can have the same. And there’s going to be more courses coming out around the personal development staff so understanding how you can up level your life and just become the happiest healthiest and most fulfilled version of you which is the journey that I’ve been on the last four years.
[00:35:30] And I’m sure that there’s going to be more. We’ve got a communications one coming out as well. So how you can be a person of value in every situation where you get to communicate. So that’s that’s why I have going on at the moment and I’m sure as time goes on there’ll be more.
[00:35:44] Let let’s go back to some of the stories you do talk show and there was one them five guys.
[00:35:48] Yes. So I was at a marketing event last week and all the big brands were there. And I happened to catch five guys speaking on a panel and the woman said something that really is so intuitive and so common sense. But when I heard it I was like yes you know she basically said when somebody is complimenting you they want some feedback and acknowledgement. But equally when someone is making a complaint they’re looking for compensation and that you needs to acknowledge when somebody has interacted with you. And there was a time frame to it as well. And it’s really important to really respect people who have interacted with you as the brand or you know you as a big boy brand and to make people feel like they matter all you know is the same kind of theme here that people matter.
[00:36:42] And it’s up to you to make them feel that they do as well because a lot of people listening to this have got very small business and they may be maybe thinking you but I don’t know if they’re a florist or they’re they’re doing something which is they feel or how do I someone complains to me how do I make that right. How would they implement that.
[00:37:04] So you mentioned the florist. So what if somebody orders flowers and it needs to be there on a certain day because it’s a birthday or an anniversary and for some reason the order gets mixed up or messed up or whatever and it arrives at daylight the person that’s ordered it looks like a complete fool the person who was meant to be receiving it feels like they’ve been forgotten about and it’s all down to the responsibility of the florist. So what can the florist do. Well they could get an emergency bouquet out so it’s not delayed if they know that there’s an issue and maybe hand deliver it themselves they can send something that’s twice the size and twice the price to make up for it and acknowledge their responsibility that they messed up and say that they don’t meet the purchaser look bad and that they help the person who was the recipients feel better. So it’s about understanding how whatever’s gone wrong has made the people involved feel and to mitigate that as best you can.
[00:38:07] What are your general thoughts on exceeding expectations.
[00:38:11] We should always exceed expectations. It’s over promise and under deliver always not the other way round. And you are only as good as the last experience somebody has had with you. The last thing that you’ve said the last thing that you’ve done and it can make or break you no matter how big or how small your company.
[00:38:28] And so just before we finish. You told me about a quote quotation you’ve always liked. Must tell us about that.
[00:38:34] I’m sure this has been my mantra even for the longest time it’s expect the unexpected and you’ll never be disappointed. It’s very personal to me because I used to judge everybody by my own yardstick. So therefore my expectations are very high. And if you didn’t meet my expectations I used to throw the baby out with the bathwater. And so now it’s about just not having any expectations and therefore you come from pace of gratitude instead. So when something does happen that you haven’t expected because you’re just showing up and being present you really just feel this sense of gratitude come over you and you also react from a place of gratitude which makes the other person feel good as well.
[00:39:17] And just to go into that a little bit further you set about showing up and feeling present and I think that’s a phrase that some people will completely and other people won’t. Maybe that will maybe go over their heads. What does that mean to you.
[00:39:32] It means a true connection. So you talk about networking for examples. If I’m talking to you. But I’m looking over your shoulder at the next person I wants to say you know that my attention is not with you. You know that I’m not right here with you. When you’re talking to somebody you can see they’re cogs turning because they’re already having a conversation with themselves about what they want to bring up next. But they’re not listening to you. When somebody is talking and you’re butting in you’re not listening.
[00:40:03] You’re in your own head about what can I say. It’s about you isn’t about his presence is being right here right now. Stay focussed and the monkey mind and the overactive brain and the mouth that wants to speak is why and you’re just really making that person still bodies says if people want to find out more about you. Where would they go to the best place would be. Polka dot com which is as he said. I E I O K us stop com and that’s also my social media handle to seise upon this. It’s been a pleasure speaking. It’s been amazing. Good luck.
[00:40:44] Thank you so much.
[00:40:53] In next week’s episode Episode 38 we will be speaking with a German Shepherd. If everything goes to plan. But who knows. But Adrian Shepherd is originally from Yorkshire now based in Japan and he’s done he’s had quite an amazing life. He’s nearly drowned twice. Caesar has been frank cramped a couple of times he’s quite quite interested in life and he does a variety of different things in Japan in productivity. He originally wisdom was teaching people English an MBA but quite quite a varied life. So that’s next week with Adrian Shepherd hopefully. Hope you have a fantastic week to leave us a review and see you.
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